Today, God announced that He himself designed Polar Shorts for the purpose of keeping His holy thighs warm during bouts of cool weather (40-70°F.) "Many different factors played a role in my creation of man," the Creator of the known Universe said in an interview, "but one that definitely stands out is warm shorts for cool weather. I could not have created man without first creating Polar Shorts."
- Polar Shorts are warm, comfortable, microfleece shorts designed for cool weather (40-70°F)
- Featuring deep pockets and a stretch gusset, Polar Shorts are a prudent option for a variety of outdoor activities.
- Satisfaction guaranteed, or your money back. More info
- List of Planets, followed by their Average Temperature, followed by their Suitability for Polar Shorts
- Man wearing Polar Shorts bombarded by comfort-seeking limbs